(no subject)

[help_wanted]

WHAT in person
WHERE hey yo
WHEN Day 116

[ all the food and cooking utensils and coffee and espresso machines and everything is

small

Like this, you know. ]

Comments

[rulesbyheart]

... has anyone seen a bottle labeled 'Drink Me'?

[loveandvore]

I haven't. Nor have I seen any mysterious mushrooms.

[dranksforthememories]

[I'm from space and don't understand this reference]

...they don't usually need instructions.

[fisherofmen]

Don't we have to go through a tiny, tiny door first?

[loveandvore]

[Are you looking for groceries? In the mall, come to the recently-added and larger-than-expected Cat Conbini, where you can find what you need and all the brands are cat-themed.

A new cashier lines up a few emptied tiny cups of coffee on his register.]

Cute, if inconvenient.

[dranksforthememories]

[wanders in while exploring the mall generally]

You don't usually sell only tiny foods, then.

[selfidentitytheft]

[CUTE CAT THINGS but. tiny itty bitty things.]

Inconvenient is right... Is the pricing mini too, or is it still full price?

[honoraria]

[peers at them]

I would be nearly impressed if I did not desperately need caffeine.

[also hello this is totally a demon, or at least a human soul stapled into a demon body, let me know if you need/want info for pings o/]

[mistruths]

[ pinches the bridge of his nose ]

Let's just hope the guests don't need their usual IV drip of caffeine today.

[loveandvore]

May I ask if things are discounted today? Could I receive several dozen small donuts for the cost of a usual-sized one?

[dranksforthememories]

Let me guess, this is nobody's magic that came from nowhere.

[selfidentitytheft]

[he was hoping for coffee actually, but.]

You'd have to order a venti-sized espresso to get a normal-sized espresso.

[dranksforthememories]

...why is all the food tiny?

[abardacttofollow]

[a bard is sitting on the park bench playing a sad song on the world's tiniest violin]

[FRANKLY, HE LOOKS DELIGHTED*]

[*Yes this isn't a food but it's how he makes his daily bread so whatever]

[ghostfromthemachine]

[ wh—

—bursts out laughing ]

Oh, well played.

[mindinthegittern]

[applauds, laughing]

[ribblerouser]

[holds up a fingernail-sized salt shaker]

It's very cute, but I'm going to need more salt than this...

[divasterous]

You could lick my arm if you wanted.

[thatsoundsfakebutokay]

Is this a medical concern?

[starspangledman]

Probably a lot more than that.

[oneknightsstand]

I can finally live my life dream...

Yes, I'd like fifty burgers, please?

[loveandvore]

That might be enough for one whole regular burger!

[curatorrid]

[looks at the menu

looks at how many items he'd have to order

how long he'd have to interact with another person to do this]

...starvation seems better...

[loveandvore]

[from a nearby seat]

Better than what?

[debuffed]

[pops the tab on the world's tiniest beer can with a fingernail, then starts to giggle as it foams over]

Ahaha, there it goes...?

[fisherofmen]

[ oho. watching him, tilting his head as if he's trying to read something. also u kno, pinging like a fellow heroic spirit, though not quite. like, fucked up shit ]

I wonder if you'll fare better at the bar, for a drink like that?

[innerdaemons]

[ he'd been trying to go clothes shopping but all the clothes he's picked out seem to be incredibly small. Hmm. ]

I wonder, does this all go back to normal soon? I'm afraid this size is a bit too, ah - - slimming for me.

[fisherofmen]

If you go with the matching diet, I'm sure you'll be able to make it fit somehow.

[ with a tiny ass smoothie in hand. insisting on drinking out of the straw even though it's fucking petite as shit ]