quietmounds | (no subject)

(no subject)

WHAT In person or texting, I don't know, I'm not your boss
WHERE Wherever you'd be at night
WHEN Day 1, night
NOTES aj said i was allowed to make a new post

[So, you've survived your first—or fiftieth, or five-hundredth—day in Quiet Mounds. Tonight, it's raining—or, it's not. Maybe you're trying to get used to your new, quiet apartment. The electricity is buzzing in that way that's hard to ignore, a silence so loud it's deafening, in that poetic sort of way.]

[Or maybe you're one of the sad sacks still working at the 24/7 joints. Or their why-am-I-even-up-this-late customers. You're the reason why capitalism does this to people, you know.]

[☽ ☽ ☽]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[just holding him, face pressed against his hair]

Shhh... shhh... it's all right...

Wh-what do I do? He's alive, but he's—

If I manage to wrap my head around it enough to answer that question with something better than "take it one day at a time," you'll be the first to know, I promise...

[gulps heavily, trying to calm himself down]

I would have been three.

[gentle hair tug]

You should have seen his face when I asked if he had a small nephew named Medren.

[sort of laugh-cries] They grow up so fast in Forst Reach.

Amazing, isn't it? And I'm the runt of the litter!

[lightly, but he's still thoroughly cuddled up]

[soft] Amazing.

I don't... I can't tell him the truth. Not... the way he is now. Even the truth will be manipulative. But I feel like I'm going to explode.

I can only imagine. What... did you tell him?

That we were... friends eventually. And he... figured out I was upset so I, I mean, he's got Empathy. I can only imagine what he's picking up. I told him I lost my lifebonded.

It's all true, just... he says that he doesn't go a day without thinking about Tylendel. It's... you remember what he was like with eighteen years of space. He's got barely, what, three? And no Yfandes.

...whether or not she finds her way here will be a large part of convincing me one way or the other as to if this place is really meant to "improve our health," I've got to say.

I couldn't agree more.

Edited 2017-05-12 03:28 (UTC)

[sigh]

I don't know what to tell you, Stef. I don't think you're wrong—gods know he can barely wrap his mind around even seeing fifteen years from his point—but...

But it's awfully cruel and heartbreaking?

To the point of being farcical if it weren't happening to two of the people I care about most in the world. Whichever world.

At least it's a farce, not a tragedy.

More tragedy is banned, that's an extremely low bar, and I object to being part of some absurdist sequel.

Oh, but a triptych is such a perfect form.

[noogies lightly]

...is the bond...?

What do you mean? Spe...cifically.

...

[opens mouth. closes mouth. tries again.]

Ex...istent??

I don't... know. I can't see it, and I barely understood it even when everything was fine. But now... Everything hurts and I feel desperately alone and empty and I'm helplessly drawn to him and it's impossible not to feel like he's the solution to everything. And I don't know how much of that's the trauma and how much is a broken bond trying to reform it even if it can't happen again, if the bond itself can be too harmed to work right again. I don't think anyone's ever got an example of a situation like this to study.

Stefen—

[YIKES?!?!?!]

Trying to figure it out is... really hard...

Is there... anything I can do...?

[just, sort of helplessly]