(no subject)

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

WHAT text
WHERE THE INTERNET
WHEN DAY 43

OKAY.
SOMEHOW YOU ASSHOLES ARE GIVING ME A MIGRAINE FROM MY SAFE HAVEN OF THIS SOULLESS AND BLINDINGLY BRIGHT COMPLIMENTARY RESPITEBLOCK.
PROBABLY BECAUSE YOU ARE DOING OR THINKING STUPID THINGS ABOUT YOUR RESPECTIVE CONCILIATORY OR CONCUPISCENT INTERESTS.
DON'T THINK I DIDN'T SEE THAT REVOLTING ATTEMPT AT UNNECESSARY AUSPISTICING FOR WHAT IS OBVIOUSLY A RESPECTABLY CONTENTIOUS LONG-RUNNING BLACKROM, EARLIER.
IT DOESN'T TAKE A PROFESSIONAL TO REALIZE THERE IS NOTHING FOR YOUR CAFFEINE CORRODED SPONGES TO DO HERE OTHER THAN FIGURE OUT HOW EXACTLY TO ROMANTICALLY FUCK BOTH EACH OTHER AND YOURSELVES WITH THE SAME SOCIALLY UNACCEPTABLE APPENDAGE.
BUT SINCE I AM BASICALLY A PROFESSIONAL.
AND ALSO PRETTY BORED.
YOU CAN LINE UP AND TELL ME ABOUT WHAT THE FUCK EVER STUPID THING YOU ARE THINKING ABOUT WHOEVER IS CURRENTLY INCURRING YOUR PITY OR HATE.
FOR YOU HUMANS THAT MEANS WHO DO YOU WANT TO LOVEFUCK OR HATEFUCK.
AND I WILL OFFER A DISINTERESTED AND COOL HEADED OUTSIDER'S OPINION ON HOW BADLY YOU ARE FUCKING UP.
YOU CAN BE ANONYMOUS IF THAT IS ALL YOU'VE GOT THE SHAMEGLOBES FOR, I DON'T ACTUALLY CARE.
OH.
AND THIS IS ALL STRICTLY PLATONIC.
I AM NOT AUSPITICING FOR ANYONE.
AND IF A SINGLE ONE OF YOU NOOKSTAINS HITS ON ME I SWEAR TO EVERY TENTACLED MOTHERFUCKER IN PARADOX SPACE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP YOUR BIZARRE ALIEN ENTRAILS OUT OF WHATEVER QUALIFIES FOR YOUR BIZARRE ALIEN SHITHOLE, UNDERSTOOD?
OKAY?
GO.

Comments

anonymous

[supraliminally]

What are your qualifications, though? Are you certified?

username: psychest

[ananass]

tl;dr :U ok but r u angry alien dear prudence?? is that whats happening

Re: anonymous

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

I HAVE A PHD IN GO FUCK YOURSELF.
IT QUALIFIES ME TO TALK ABOUT BASICALLY WHATEVER I WANT WITH ABSOLUTE AND UNQUESTIONED AUTHORITY.

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

YES.
THAT IS WHAT ALL OF THOSE ALIEN WORDS AND CONCEPTS I JUST TALKED ABOUT INDICATED.
ALSO ME IDENTIFYING YOU BY YOUR SPECIES.
AND SAYING THE WORD ALIEN A FEW TIMES.
GOOD JOB DISCERNING OBVIOUS, STAR CHAMP!
THE GENIUS IS YOU.

[ananass]

how do u change text colur

[supraliminally]

You know, for all you insist that this is strictly a platonic endeavor, you're coming on a little strong, aren't you?

anonymous

[foretasted]

yea actually i kinda feel like there are some things i should talk to sokeone about ......

turntechGodhead

[clocked_out]

oh my god

1800propsychic

[proficient_in_photoshop]

i have 4 incredible handsome men who are all dreamy, low drama, great in the sack, and loving, and basically only compete for fun to impress me. is this legal according to inter-planetary standards

B100D80RN3

[deathblossomisready]

whats blackrom

anonymous

[lovelyspecimen]

lol

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

DON'T EVEN FUCKING START.
THIS IS NOT MY FIRST MUSCLEBEAST SNARING FESTIVITY, ASSHOLE.
TAKE YOUR COY "I CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ALL CONSUMING PLATONIC HATE FOR EVERYTHING IN EVERY UNIVERSE AND ACTUAL FUCKING CHEMISTRY BETWEEN TWO INDIVIDUALS WHO TAKE THE TIME TO BUILD UP A RESPECTABLE MUTUAL LOATHING" SHTICK AND STICK IT UP AFOREMENTIONED ALIEN SHITHOLE.

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

BY SLITTING YOUR WRISTS AND WRITING ON YOUR PRESSURE SENSITIVE COMMUNICATION TABLET IN THE COLOR OF YOUR OWN PERSONAL SHAME.

Re: anonymous

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

FINALLY.
DON'T MAKE ME ASK YOU A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS, I HATE THAT GAME.
JUST SPILL.

Re: turntechGodhead

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

THANKS FOR THE HELPFUL CONTRIBUTION, STRIDER.

turbosHot

[fastandloose]

I didn't get a lot of that, but I did that there's not a lot to do other than the appendage thing. But I just got here so I don't have anyone specific.

Can you tell me what all I'm walking into, maybe? Intricate webs of lies? Popularity contests? Is anyone even single?

un: leekzarus

[caughtbythecurrent]

well i mean if you WANT me to tell you all about my amazing girlfriend that i got the chance to be with again after death and who is super cute
then i can do that ヾ(＠^∇^＠)ノ

Re: 1800propsychic

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

I REALIZE YOU ARE JUST BEING AN ASSHOLE.
BUT I'M ACTUALLY CURIOUS IF A HUMAN HAS SATISFACTORILY FILLED ALL FOUR QUADRANTS, OR IF YOU HAVE JUST DONE THE TYPICAL STUPID HUMAN THING AND OVER-BALANCED YOUR FLUSHED QUADRANT WHICH HAS NEVER IN THE HISTORY OF ALL SPACE-TIME IMPLODED INTO STUPID DRAMA.
I'M ASSUMING IT'S THE LATTER SINCE NO ONE HAS EVER DESCRIBED A SUCCESSFUL CALIGINOUS RELATIONSHIP AS LOW DRAMA.
BUT, SURE.
I'LL BITE.
WOW. SOUNDS REALLY AMAZING! WHAT A LUCKY FELLA/DAME/OTHER.
HOW DID YOU DO IT.

Re: 1800propsychic

[proficient_in_photoshop]

by virtue of incredibly bad luck my whole life until now. i stored up all my magnetic charisma for four distinct power moves.
ok but hold up i have questions
so where you're from you're supposed to have four lovers but they all serve different purposes including one that's like, deliberately bad?
that sounds unhealthy

[ananass]

i can't believe you're making me google this. you give terrible advice.

HERE we go, now I can express my REAL FEELS 8D ok. im gonna give you a scenario.

Re: B100D80RN3

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

YOU KNOW I WAS REALLY READY TO BE MAD ABOUT THIS QUESTION.
BUT THEN EVERYONE WAS WAY MORE OF AN NOOKSTAIN BEFORE YOU EVEN GOT HERE.
SO NOW EXPLAINING BASIC ROMANTIC CONCEPTS IS BASICALLY A RELAXING ACTIVITY IN BETWEEN SCHOOLFEEDING ALL THESE CHUMPS WHO THINK THINK THEY CAN TROLL A TROLL.
SO YEAH, ANYWAY.
BLACKROM IS FOR THE QUADRANTS INFORMED PRIMARILY BY THE EMOTION OF HATE. IT INCLUDES BOTH KISMESISSITUDE AND AUSPISTICISM, THOSE ARE THE CALIGINOUS QUADRANTS AND ASHEN QUADRANTS RESPECTIVELY.
BUT OF COURSE NO ONE WANTS TO TALK ABOUT THE UNDERAPPRECIATED ROLE OF AUSPISTICE BECAUSE IT'S NOT EXCITING SO WHAT YOU REALLY WANT TO HEAR ABOUT AND WHAT PEOPLE USUALLY MEAN WHEN THEY TALK ABOUT BLACKROM IS THE CALIGINOUS QUADRANT.
WHICH IS BASICALLY WHEN YOU'RE COMPLETELY DRAWN TO SOMEONE DESPITE HATING THEIR INSUFFERABLE GUTS.

Re: anonymous

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

FUCK OFF.

Re: B100D80RN3

[deathblossomisready]

interesting
can some1 go back and forth between that and love

[shoutingnubbypinchcritter]

I CAN'T ACTUALLY BELIEVE WHAT A PRACTICAL AND REASONABLE QUESTION THAT IS.
THAT LITERALLY NO ONE HAS EVER ASKED ME EVER.
INCLUDING MYSELF.
THEN AGAIN THAT GUY IS OBVIOUSLY A FUCKING MORON.
ANYWAY.
I HAVEN'T BEEN HERE LONG EITHER BUT I'VE DONE THIS MORE TIMES THAN I WANT TO MONOLOGUE ABOUT RIGHT NOW,
SO IT'S NOT HARD TO GUESS.
FIRST OF ALL, 'SINGLE' IS A USELESS DESCRIPTOR OF LITERALLY ANYONE, COMING OUT OF THE FACT THAT FOR SOME MOTHERGRUBBING REASON YOUR SPECIES DEVELOPED A WEIRD OBSESSION FOR THE IDEA OF MONOGAMY.
WHAT YOU WANT TO KNOW IS ANYONE AVAILABLE.
AND THE ANSWER IS YES. THERE ARE ALWAYS PEOPLE WHO ARE CURRENTLY OR IMMINENTLY AVAILABLE.
AS FOR THE REST, ALSO YES.
YOU ARE BOTH WALKING INTO A INTRICATE WEB OF LIES AND ALSO POPULARITY CONTESTS.
BECAUSE BOTH OF THOSE THINGS ARE JUST MECHANISMS BY WHICH WE NAVIGATE THIS CRAZY THING CALLED LIFE.
NO MATTER HOW MANY LIVES YOU LIVES OR TIMES YOU DIE.
IT'S A SMALL TOWN WITH A BUNCH OF PEOPLE FROM DIFFERENT UNIVERSES BUT MOST OF YOU DON'T SEEM INCLINED TO STAB EACH OTHER EVEN WHEN IT WOULD BE A PRETTY REASONABLE RESPONSE. SO HONESTLY IT'S PROBABLY NOT ALL THAT BAD.

[supraliminally]

All I'm saying is that there's a very fine line between having a generalized platonic loathing for everyone and being a hate slut, and honestly? This feels sort of slutty. Not that I'm criticizing, obviously I'm in favor of sluttiness in general.